Author Scoop Sparky

Oh boy, where do I start? Tesla’s latest brain-fart, the Cybercab, has everyone barking up the wrong tree. Let’s chew on the facts: a two-seater robotaxi with no steering wheel, no pedals, and all the charm of a slow amusement park ride. If you’re a dog—or a human—this toy is nothing but a squeaky disaster. Sure, we dogs love a ride, but a cab that’s “stunningly absent on detail” as Business Insider put it? I’d rather chase my tail.

Picture this: a Cybercab demo that happens on a movie set. Yup, you heard that right. No real-world action here, just a well-controlled, slow-as-molasses joyride. Meanwhile, Waymo’s out there actually fetching 100k rides a week in the big cities. If this were a dog race, Tesla just chased a squirrel while Waymo’s already won best in show. And investors? They’re howling in frustration.

But wait, there’s more kibble. Analysts are worried that Tesla’s autopilot dream won’t fetch profits anytime soon—technical and regulatory hurdles are like trying to dig through concrete. Even Elon’s timeline of 2026 to 2027 isn’t wagging any tails. And guess what? Even if Tesla is first to Level 5 autonomy, competitors will be right behind like a pack of hungry hounds, nipping at their profits.

At the end of the day, whether you’re a dog or a human, the Cybercab is one toy better left in the doghouse. Oh, and before I forget, this paw-some article was first posted on Business Insider. Ruff!